TITLE: Scars
AUTHOR: Jmas
EMAIL: jmasg1@bellsouth.net
CATEGORY: Snippet
SPOILERS: Broca Divide, Solitudes, There But For the Grace of God, Children of the
Gods, Stargate the movie, Serpent's Grasp, Holiday, The Gamekeeper, One False Step,
Legacy
SEASON / SEQUEL:
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS:
SUMMARY: Medical assessments lead to a rather surprising assessment on Jack's part.
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Stargate Fan, Heliopolis, Belle, Place of Our Legacy
DISCLAIMER: Characters are property of MGM, etc.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Jack is being rather pushy lately in his demands for POV stories
(big surprise, hunh?), so I am indulging him so he'll let me be mean to him...and
Daniel...later!

Tests, tests...and for a change...more tests.

Physical assessment time is...without a doubt...my least favorite part of military duty.

Especially this particular military duty. Travelling all over the galaxy via the Stargate
Express comes with its own particularly nasty set of required tests that your mother
never dreamed of telling you about!

Like MRI's after every mission to check for any possible Goa'uld hitch-hikers. Its a
wonder we don't start sticking to the 'gate on our way out....

Then there are the dreaded 'fluid samples'. Fluids I never gave much thought to, much
less expected to donate in the name of "Science" and the protection of the planet. It's
always amazed me how Janet Fraiser can make pi-- um...relieving oneself...in a cup
sound like a patriotic duty. I know Uncle Sam wanted me, but I didn't think he wanted
that much of me...

And then there's my new favorite...scar-mapping. These doctors get to have a peek at
every inch of us, marking all our 'bodily imperfections' and 'distinguishing marks' on
these little charts....which basically means every little scar, mole and birthmark is
catalogued against the day when we may be suspected of having uninvited guests
(Goa'ulds) or 'for identification purposes'...meaning if we die in a really messy way they'll
still be able to figure out who we are...but that's the part nobody really talks about.

And naturally, as a team leader, I get to go over all this stuff with the docs so that I know
that my team is in the best possible physical condition for duty...yeah, right. This sure
falls under my top ten things- to- do- when- you- aren't- out- saving- life- as- we- know-
it.

So here we are...

Janet's prattling on about this test result and that test result.....and I'm trying to pay
attention, I really am, but those little scar maps catch my attention....

Carter doesn't have too many scars...hand, from the time those singing nudists took
Daniel's knife, and of course the one across her stomach, not much of one....and, hey,
that's where that mole is....

Teal'c...doesn't have any scars, courtesy of Junior....of course that big X is more than
enough for identification purposes....

Me...I haven't got as many as I ought to...that Irish luck and charm is hard at work. My
left eye seems to be everybody's favorite target....

And then there's Daniel....

The least military of us all and he's gotten more injuries in the line of duty than the rest of
us put together.....

There's the one on his forehead from his imitation of a rocket when he was thrown out of
the wormhole at top speed. Teal'c said Daniel was out of it for hours, but then he woke up
and figured out what had happened to Carter and me, so I guess it didn't scramble his
brain too much...although it did take him a couple of days...so maybe it did a little bit.
There's a matched set of scrapes across his chest from his little excursion on the dark side
of Tuplo's planet...Sure scared the life out of me that time. Even as tranked up as I was
because of that virus, I remember the sick dread I felt when Teal'c told me Daniel was
missing. Those caveman wannabe's sure tore him up...so did I. It took me a long time to
forgive myself for that, as usual Daniel said there was nothing to forgive....

Then there's that staff burn scar on his upper right arm compliments of that alternate-
reality Teal'c. Another time Daniel scared another crop of grey hair into me. It's hard
enough not to worry about Daniel when he's right there where I can see him....

Look what happened to him on Klorel's ship. Out of my sight for five minutes and he
winds up with half his chest blown away. I thought he was dead...hell, he thought he was
dead....It wasn't the first time he'd come back from the dead, but I sure hope it's the last
time he gets that close. Thanks to that damnable sarcophagus, he hasn't got any physical
scars from his first actual death and second near-death...now there's a concept I wouldn't
have dreamed of a few years ago...but I know that he's had nightmares about all of
his...er, close calls....and still does.

There's a lot more scars on Daniel's chart, some I know the origins of and some I
don't...but it occurs to me as I toss the chart back into Daniel's file that most of Daniel's
scars are never going to show up on that scar map.

It doesn't leave a scar when you get your heart ripped out repeatedly because you've lost
the only woman you ever loved...

It doesn't leave a scar when your heart breaks as you destroy the only known means to
restore that woman to her former self...

It doesn't leave a scar when your brain gets so scrambled that you do things so
completely against your nature that the very thought of those violations can make you
sick to your stomach...

It doesn't leave a scar when you're totally dismissed by your friends and the fate of the
world is at stake....

It doesn't leave a scar when some alien flake makes you watch your worst childhood
nightmare over and over again...

It doesn't leave a scar to have some alien old guy trades minds with you, robbing you of
your body as well as your hope...

It doesn't leave a scar to have the people you trust the most in this world lock you away
because they think you've lost it....

No...stuff like that doesn't leave scars....

Not the kind you can see.

*fin*