Title: So Far from Real
Date: June 16, 2001
Status: Complete
Author: Jmas
Category: Drama, angst
Rating: PG-13
Email: jmasg1@bellsouth.net
Archive: Stargate Fan, Heliopolis, Belle, Place of Our Legacy
Spoilers: Double Jeopardy, Fire and Water, Small Victories, The Light, The First Ones, and Scorched Earth
Summary: Reflections on mortality….
Author's note: Another of the missing scenes or tags for season 4 I promised to the HC list.
Disclaimer: The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa’uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.
~*~
So Far from Real
By
Jmas

Jack could see Teal’c was already out, kel-no-reeming as the airmen carried his stretcher through the gate under the watchful eye of Dr. Fraiser - after she’d assured them the big jaffa would be fine.

All in all it had been a damn good day. Chronos was dead, and they’d scored the biggest jackpot ever in the technology stakes - one huge, honking mother of a mother ship and not a Tok’ra around to say they couldn’t keep it.

‘Yeah…’ Jack couldn’t help the big grin of satisfaction from erupting. The President, the money men, the boys at Groom Lake were all going to get something that would guarantee years of hassle-free gate travel for the SGC. They’d finally justified their existence in a way even Kinsey couldn’t dispute…and they’d done it the right way, without selling out or selling off pieces of their integrity.

As two airmen approached with a sheet-covered stretcher, Jack’s smile faded.

The clones.

‘Are we still so very far from real to you?’

His clone’s almost-last words came back to him clearly and Jack had to admit he’d been wrong. Despite his counterpart’s irritating tendency to challenge Jack at every turn, he and his team had really come through in a big way. SG1-squared had pulled the mission off - together - and Jack promised never to forget it. He had no idea if Harlan could repair the clones…a part of Jack hoped so….and he also promised if he did, they wouldn’t be left out in the cold again. Harlan was waiting back on Earth for the return of his companions for the past two years. As irritating as the old guy - clone - could be, Jack couldn’t help hoping he wouldn’t be left alone again. Having met his double, Jack was sure Harlan’s life recently had been far from boring.

Another stretcher approached and Jack noticed the sheet dipped down in a defining separation between the shoulders and the head. Jack had seen all the other clone bodies so this one had to be….

‘Our Daniel is dead….’

The words had shuddered through Jack, the memory of saying those words himself after Nem’s implanted false memories had left them certain Daniel was lost to them forever. Even then the words had to be forced out, pushing past the disbelief to the surface. Now, he couldn’t imagine the cost of saying them, didn’t want to contemplate just how close they had come this year to the necessity - the appendix scare, the Enkaran thing, the Unas, the light-induced trip to Daniel’s balcony ledge. Daniel had been using up way too many lives lately, and Jack figured his friend had to be running a deficit by now.

As the airmen respectfully deposited the stretcher next to the first one and disappeared back into the trees, Jack couldn’t stop himself from stooping down, pulling back the sheet….

And hit his knees.

Daniel - the clone - looked so real. The expression on the still face was one Jack could easily recognize from his Daniel, one of acceptance and peace in the face of a death to protect his friends. Jack knew this look, had seen it more than once though thankfully not etched there for all time.

During the long night of planning preparatory to their assault of Chronos’ ship, the other Jack had told him about Daniel’s death, a sense of quiet pride in his team cutting through the arrogant façade in a way Jack understood all too well.

Looking down on this other Daniel, Jack couldn’t quite suppress a shudder. He wished his Daniel had been here, wished he were here now. Seeing and knowing his other teammates were okay had alleviated the shock of seeing the bodies of the clones. But Daniel was worlds away from Earth and even more worlds away from Juna. On an important mission, granted, but not where he belonged. And not where Jack needed him to be. Now.

A rustling of underbrush alerted him to the approach of the last of the retrieval team with Carter in tow. Jack tried to pull the sheet up, but he saw Carter take it all in, saw her eyes widen in a reflection of his own shock and unsettled feelings. Rising, he left the sheet open; this was something she needed to face as much as he did.

Jack nodded shortly, there was nothing he could add and certainly no words he could offer to make this any easier. Even knowing this wasn’t their Daniel, the gut reaction was strong and visceral.

Carter stopped down to lightly stroke the long hair on the clone’s forehead. “When…when is Daniel due back, sir?”

Tearing his eyes away, Jack focused on the airman at the DHD and cleared his throat of the lump that had settled there. “Tonight, I think….” Jack realized he didn’t need to ask why she wanted to know.

With a last touch to the clone’s smooth forehead, Carter replaced the sheet and stood, shrugging her shoulder as she carefully avoided Jack’s eyes. “No reason, sir. Just thinking he’s been gone a long time. Maybe we should all…”

“Get together?”

“Do something….”

“Dinner?”

“O’Malley’s?”

“Still banned…”

“My place?”

Jack thought about Carter’s girlie cottage, very much her but not….

“Daniel’s place.”

*fin*