TITLE: Windows and Walls
AUTHOR: Jmas
Date: August 17, 1999
EMAIL: jmasg1@bellsouth.net
CATEGORY: Drama, angst, h/c
SPOILERS: Almost every episode, up to and including 'Legacy'(just
call me the flashback kid!)
SEASON / SEQUEL: Sequel to Walls
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS:
SUMMARY: While searching for a missing Stargate the team learns
about themselves and each other...
STATUS: Complete
ARCHIVE: Stargate Fan, Heliopolis, Belle, Place of Our Legacy
DISCLAIMER: Characters are property of MGM, etc.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: *Things we keep hidden behind the walls we
erect between ourselves and those closest to us can sometimes
be glimpsed through the windows of the soul*...my philosophical
contribution for the day.
Special thanks to Brenda Anders, beta and new friend, thanks
for everything!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chapter One
"Hang in there, Danny. We should be there soon."
Daniel nodded at the words, but Jack wondered if the younger
man really heard him. Daniel seemed to be directing all of
his attention towards putting one foot in front of the other.
'The kid never ceases to amaze me...' Jack thought.
Two days before they had been pulling Daniel on a travois
because he lacked the strength to stand, much less walk. Jack
remembered the argument Daniel had put up over the travois
idea. In the end Jack had won, but as soon as Daniel had been
able to walk without assistance the travois had been returned
to its former status as a tent.
'Stubborn doesn't begin to cover it...' Jack mused; half in
consternation, half in bemused admiration.
Jack was still having trouble sorting out the events of Daniel's
strange illness; the alien venom that had broken down all mental
barriers between Jack and the man he had thought he knew so
well. In the later stages of the illness, Daniel had become
lost within his own terrifying memories and it had been left
to Jack to save his friend's mind..and his life.
In many ways, Jack had been shocked by what he had discovered
while sharing thoughts with Daniel. It was one thing to know
Daniel was the genius that everyone purported him to be...it
was quite another to experience that brilliant, intuitive mind
firsthand. It still made Jack dizzy to recall the lightning
speed at which Daniel's mind operated...and it bothered Jack
more than he would ever admit to realize that he didn't understand
much of what went on in there.
Jack could feel the anger boiling inside him even now as he
recalled other experiences he had unwillingly been privy to
inside Daniel's head. No one person should have to deal with
so much grief in a single lifetime...
'The kid is just such a ...good guy.' Jack thought with a
quiet snort. 'One of those annoying people who just wants to
see everybody get a happy ending...even if it means giving
up his own.' Jack knew that some people considered that very
naive, but some people just didn't know Daniel...
An unfamiliar wave of sympathy swept through Jack. He'd been
brought up to believe that the scales of life balanced out
in the long run. Given the tragic events of his own life, he
wasn't sure what he believed in anymore. What he did know was
that, somehow...someday, Daniel had more than earned the chance
at something good.
As they neared the top of the rise, Carter called out that
they were almost there. Jack breathed a deep sigh of relief.
Between their four canteens, they might have had a pint of
water. They had used the last of their MRE's for breakfast.
The river was their best chance of surviving until Daniel could
decipher the symbols in the stone structure Carter and Teal'c
had found three days ago. Hopefully the writing would provide
a clue to the disappearance of the Stargate.
'If Daniel can decipher it,' Jack thought with his usual pessimism,
then he remembered the vast knowledge his young friend possessed,
the intensive drive that even now shocked him...he'd always
known Daniel was single-minded, almost to the point of obsession,
but he'd barely seen the surface of Daniel's incredible 'quest'
to learn all it was possible to know...
'Daniel will do it,' Jack affirmed to himself. 'He's got to...he's
the only game in town.'
The 'only game in town' gasped a little as he stumbled once
again on one of the multitude of sharp, volcanic rocks that
seemed to make up the entire surface of P3J050. Jack reached
out a hand to steady Daniel and received a small smile in return.
Jack took the opportunity to check Daniel's temperature once
again and smiled himself at the fact that Daniel didn't bite
off his head...or his hand...at the paternal gesture. Daniel
usually did not react well to what he termed Jack's 'mothering.'
As they crested the ridge, Jack felt a surge of hope for the
first time since they had arrived through the Stargate. Below
them stretched a green fertile valley, so incongruous to everything
they had seen so far. A small forest skirted a small, winding
river at the base of snow-capped mountains.
Jack reached out to stop Daniel, who had once again been walking
with closed eyes.
"We're here, Danny..." He said gently.
Daniel opened his eyes, looking out over the valley, swaying
a little now that he had stopped moving. Jack put out a hand
raising his eyebrow in a question. Daniel started to shake
his head at the offer of help, then sighed and nodded. Jack
readjusted his weapon and slipped an arm under Daniel's shoulder,
allowing him to lean a little of his weight on Jack.
Carter looked over in concern making a gesture as if to ask
if the colonel needed assistance, but Jack shook his head.
It was better not to make a big deal of it. It was just as
hard for Daniel to ask for and accept help as it was for Jack.
That self-reliant streak was something common to both men;
it was the source that was different. Jack had learned to count
on himself over years as a tough city kid and later as a covert
operative in the military. Daniel's independence came from
necessity...he had never had anyone else to rely on.
As they approached the river, Jack scouted visually for a
likely campsite, finally settling on a defensible spot near
the stone structure and the river. Jack helped Daniel to the
ground up next to a tree. Daniel nodded gratitude, but didn't
open his eyes. As Jack moved to help the others set up camp,
he motioned for Carter to check out Daniel.
After the tents were set up and the necessary gear unpacked,
Jack broke out the fishing line and hooks from the survival
gear. Motioning for Teal'c to grab the canteens, they headed
for the river. Jack spent a few minutes showing Teal'c how
to set up a trot line, which Teal'c dubbed a "most efficient
way to capture fish."
When Tealc left to return to camp, Jack took the opportunity
to wash off a week's worth of P3J050. Getting his body somewhat
cleaner made him realize how dirty his clothes were and he
made a mental note to set up a laundry detail when time allowed.
As Jack finished dousing his head into the river, Carter came
through the trees waving a couple of bandannas. She tossed
one to Jack, who used it to dry his face.
Jack just looked at her, he didn't need to ask the question.
Carter shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, Sir. The
arm looks better, the fever hasn't come back. He should be
getting stronger, but..."
Jack cut her off there, he was in mood to hear 'buts', it
was enough right now that they were finally here and Daniel
was alive...
"He's gonna be fine, Carter. He's got more going for
him than any of us ever guessed at..." Jack stopped, realizing
that he was saying too much.
Carter arched an eyebrow at him in curiousity at the unexpected
outburst. Jack knew she'd been dying to know more about the
three days the team had been separated, but Jack was determined
not to tell her more than the general information he had already
given her...It was just too....too close, too private.
Jack turned away and headed back to camp, leaving her staring
after him as of he'd just grown two heads.
Teal'c had put on coffee for his friends. Although Teal'c
did not share this peculiar Tau'ri addiction, he was generally
supportive of it and had learned to make it some time ago.
Thanks to Daniel's not-so-secret stash, coffee was one thing
they still had plenty of.
Jack saw that Daniel was awake and trying to get up, holding
onto the tree for support.
Before he could stop himself, Jack said, "Daniel, dammit...Would
you just stay put!"
Daniel's eyes flashed, "Jack, I'm never going to get
better if I don't try..."
Realizing that his friend was right, and that his comment
had been unnecessary, Jack walked over and put out a hand to
help Daniel. Daniel stared at the hand suspiciously for a moment,
his expression clearing as his anger died its usual quick death.
Daniel accepted Jack's hand and support as he moved over to
the fire. The day had been exhausting and he simply didn't
have the energy to walk any further. Teal'c handed them both
a cup of coffee, which they accepted gratefully.
Daniel took a long breath, glancing quickly at Jack before
speaking, "Teal'c, tell me about the writing you guys
saw in there." His hand pointed at the small stone structure,
just visible beyond the treees.
Before Teal'c could reply, Jack shot Daniel the C.O. look. "Daniel,
it can wait."
Daniel returned Jack's glare with one of his own, the one
that said there was a mystery at hand and they were wasting
time.
"Tomorrow, Daniel," Jack said with finality, broaching
no arguments.
Time, Jack realized, like coffee, they had plenty of.
Chapter 2
Sam had been full of questions already about what had occurred
between the colonel and Daniel, but after the colonel's statement
beside the river....
'The colonel pulling a Mr. Spock?' Sam just couldn't wrap
her mind around the concept...
It was true that the colonel had always been more than usually
tolerant with the young scientist and over time she had watched
that tolerance grow into respect and even affection. Still,
the colonel had always seemed to be more of the 'tough love'
type, pushing Daniel for what the colonel considered his own
good. This new attitude was something she didn't quite fathom...
'He's got more going for him than any of us ever guessed at...'
Sam had always...well, nearly always...known there was more
to the gentle, intellectual scientist than met the eye. They
all had. But now the colonel said it with a conviction that
hadn't been there before. She had caught the colonel watching
Daniel several times during their long hike with an expression
of total bafflement. It was almost as if his 'kid' had grown
up suddenly before his very eyes.
Daniel had certainly not been giving any clues away. Of course,
Daniel hadn't been able to do more than sleep, eat and walk
for the past three days...
He'd eaten better last night. Daniel knew as well as she did
that if he didn't take care of himself the colonel wouldn't
let him attempt the translation. Afterwards, Daniel had fallen
asleep again leaning up against the log next to the fire. The
colonel and Teal'c had carried Daniel into his tent without
even waking him. Sam had seen the colonel check Daniel's temperature
one last time before leaving the tent. That was their tough-guy
colonel alright...
This morning the colonel had coaxed Daniel down to the river
to clean up a little before going to see the writing. That,
a cup a coffee and a breakfast of more fish had seemed to energize
the young man. He was more animated than she had seen him in
too many days. Privately, she thought his energy had more to
do with the mystery at hand than anything else.
From the moment they entered the rather plain stone structure,
Sam realized that they were lost to Daniel. Daniel started
muttering to himself right away, his mind racing far ahead
of his speech center. Sam knew at that moment they had become
little more than a rag-tag honor guard; all they could do now
was look after Daniel, making sure that he ate, slept, breathed
(it had happened before). Sam smiled as they all moved out
of Daniel's way as he moved around the walls, still muttering.
This was classic Daniel and she was more than happy to see
it...
She glanced over to see the colonel rolling his eyes and grinning,
but behind the gesture she could see an edge of concern. They
all knew how necessary it was to determine if this writing
could help them find the Stargate, but Daniel was recovering
from a very serious illness.
They fell into the routine with the ease of long practice.
Teal'c moved to guard the entry. The colonel laid a fire in
the brazier at the center of the room to drive away the chill
dampness. Sam pulled out the digital recorder, moving around
the walls behind Daniel. who was muttering something about "indefinite
language roots" and taking notes so fast she was getting
dizzy just watching.
After thoroughly taping the inscriptions, Sam settled next
to the fire beside the colonel, who was still watching Daniel
like a hawk. "Or a mother hen with one chick," Sam
thought with an inward giggle. Daniel had been going at it
steadily for nearly three hours and Sam noticed that he needed
to lean on the wall for support more often. 'It won't be long
now,' Sam thought, watching the colonel watch Daniel. Sure
enough, Daniel stumbled a little against the wall and the colonel
was on his feet in a flash, making Daniel sit down to rest
near the fire.
"I'm okay, Jack..."
The colonel made a rude noise, handing Daniel the canteen.
As the young scientist raised it to his lips his hands were
shaking. From the colonel's tight-lipped expression, Sam knew
that he noticed as well.
"Time for a break, Danny..." Sam recognized the
soft, private tone that the colonel used; it was a rare tone,
one that could break through the worst of Daniel's moods and
one that Daniel almost always responded to.
Daniel nodded and let the colonel help him lay down on the
floor near the fire. This wasn't the first time Sam had witnessed
the unexpectedly gentle side of the relationship between the
two men, but it never failed to touch and surprise her. They
were both such powerful personalities; almost always directly
opposed to one another in any argument. It never failed to
amaze her that at the core of everything, they were such good
friends.
Sam realized that they had been so busy just trying to survive
that she hadn't stopped to think how close her two friends
had come to dying. If she and Teal'c hadn't returned when they
did, if the colonel hadn't been able to find his way out...
Sam shivered, despite the warmth of the room and got up to
cover the reaction, moving to join Teal'c at the doorway. The
colonel covered Daniel with his jacket, then joined them.
"We'll give him an hour," The colonel said, quietly. "Why
don't you two go back and see about putting together some kind
of dinner? I'll stay here and keep Daniel out of trouble..."
They all smiled at the unlikelihood of that concept, turning
as one to glance at the sleeping form still clutching his notebook
to his chest. Sam had the sudden thought that it wasn't fair
that all their hope to get home was centered on the Daniel,
who, by all rights, should be in a hospital.
'But then,' Sam thought sadly, 'when have things ever been
fair for Daniel?'
Chapter 3
Daniel awoke with a start, for a moment unsure of where he
was. He was still feeling more than a little disassociated
from the 'psychic bug juice', as Jack had dubbed it. He had
experienced flashbacks of memories he knew did not belong to
him. He could still hear the sound of the shot...
"Daniel?"
Jack was looking at Daniel an expression of concern that made
Daniel want to cringe; he hated being the cause of concern
to his friends, especially Jack. Daniel moved to get up, but
Jack gripped his shoulder to keep him down.
"Daniel, we're not running a race here. Now that we have food and water,
we can afford to take a little time with this."
Daniel tried not to gape at Jack's unusual attitude, realizing
just how worried Jack was about him. Normally, Daniel would
have found the paternal sterness of Jack's tone irritating,
but right now it was a source of comfort. Daniel gave a brief
smile and leaned back. It had been a rough time for all of
them and he didn't have the energy or the desire to argue.
Jack was regarding at Daniel with a questioning look, handing
over the canteen. Daniel noted with consternation that his
hands were still trembling with exhaustion. He hated the pervasive
weakness that had been his constant companion for nearly a
week now.
"So, find anything out so far?" Jack asked in that
pseudo-interested way that told Daniel that Jack understood.
Daniel laughed a little at the obvious diversionary tactic
and allowed himself to be steered away from his dark thoughts.
"Yeah, actually the writing is an offshoot of the Egyptian
sub-family of the Hamito-Semitic languages, but there's an
odd flavor to the vowel patterns..." Daniel trailed off,
noticing Jack was looking at him strangely. "What? Should
I start over...?"
Jack shook his head. "No...uh...I actually think I understood
that."
Jack sounded so amazed that Daniel almost laughed. "It
must be some kind of residual..."
"Weirdness from that over-stuffed head of yours." Jack
finished and Daniel nodded agreeing to the concept, if not
the words.
They hadn't really spoken about their shared memories other
than a brief 'thank you' as Daniel had fallen asleep just before
they had set out on the long hike to the river. Daniel vaguely
recalled that Jack had promised they would talk about it later.
He wondered if now was 'later' enough.
"Jack, I..."
Jack put up a hand to stop Daniel, looking away briefly before
speaking. "It's nothing we didn't already know..." Jack's
voice was low and rough, too close to that emotional center
that he rarely allowed to show.
"...just more." Daniel agreed, his own tone hesitant.
He was no more comfortable talking...or thinking...about what
had happened than Jack was.
The two men looked at each other and laughed ruefully, deciding
they could live with it. Talking wasn't going to change the
simple facts of the reality. Jack put out a hand to help Daniel
to his feet.
"I'm hungry. Let's call it a day."
While they waited for dinner to cook (fish and some sort of
root plant that Sam had found and cleared as edible), Daniel
poured over his notes, transcribing his unique shorthand into
something more detailed. He didn't notice when Sam placed his
food next to him. When it became obvious that direct action
was called for Sam reached out and removed the notebook and
pen from his hands, replacing them with the plate and fork.
"Eat first," she ordered gently.
Daniel had the good grace to look apologetic. As he began
to eat mechanically, his mind still reviewing his notes, even
without the visual aid, Daniel was unaware of the surreptitious
looks of his teammates. Finishing his food and returning to
his notebook, he was equally unaware of the sigh of relief
and amusement his friends released.
As darkness approached, Teal'c called Jack to the edge of the
clearing. After a brief, quiet conversation, Daniel was startled
out of his concentration by a loud curse from Jack.
"Teal'c's pretty sure we're being watched," Jack
announced, going into C.O. mode without missing a beat. "I
don't want anybody going off alone anymore and we're going
to double up on guard duty. Teal'c and me first, then Teal'c
and Carter."
It was simple logic, Daniel knew that. Teal'c simply didn't
require the sleep that the humans did; a few hours of meditation
were all that he required to replenish his energy. Teal'c understood
Jack's reasoning and moved off to do just that.
Daniel looked up at Jack, blue eyes glowering as he prepared
to argue with Jack that he was fully capable of standing watch
like the rest of his team. Jack kneeled down next to Daniel
with a sigh.
"Look, Daniel...That out there,' he motioned vaguely
at the forest around them, "that's a maybe. This," he
said, tapping the notebook in Daniel's hand, "is not.
We need you to do what you do best...translate that thing and
get us the hell out of here."
Daniel blinked at the off-hand compliment, accepting Jack's
assessment, but his expression made it plain that he was not
happy about it.
"Okay, Jack."
Jack smiled, pleased to have won another argument, and started
to rise.
"For tonight anyway..." Daniel added, firmly.
The qualification wasn't lost on Jack, who sighed and gave
a noncommittal grunt.
Chapter 4
Daniel kept working well into the night. When Jack caught
him blinking blearily at his notes in the firelight, Daniel
was packed off to his tent. Jack heard the distinct phrase, "Enjoy
it while you can" and the young scientist was asleep.
Jack laughed, glad that Daniel was regaining his strength...as
well as his sense of humor.
Jack took the time then to familiarize himself with the sounds
around him. Some of those sounds were surprisingly normal:
cricket-like chirruping, leaves rustling in the light breeze,
the occasional gurgle as the river flowed its way over stones.
Once Jack felt confident that he could recognize any disturbances
in the peaceful night routine, he let himself relax somewhat.
Jack found his attention wandering back to Daniel's tent and
he could just make out the young man's face in the firelight,
brow creased as if he were still hard at work, even in sleep.
Jack became aware of being watched and turned to meet Teal'c's
eyes, finding understanding in the dark depths. They both knew
how close they had come to losing Daniel on this one.
Jack sighed only slightly embarrassed to be caught in 'mother
hen' mode. Jack knew Teal'c shared the strange compulsion to
watch over and protect the younger man. 'Maybe it's an unwritten
law,' Jack thought with a smile, 'look out for children and
one overly-intelligent, far-too-trusting, entirely-too-sensitive,
universal conscience.'
Jack's smile faded as he wondered how Daniel had managed to
maintain that wide-open acceptance, that air of wonder at everything...and
everyone...he met. Given what Jack had picked up on concerning
Daniel's early history,
it was hard to imagine how that essential goodness had survived...
Even lost in thought, Jack could hear Carter slip out of her
tent and move straight for the coffee pot. When she indicated
that she was awake and taking over, he made a goodnight noise
and crawled into his own tent.
'Jack!'
Jack shot out of the tent to find Teal'c and Carter staring
at him strangely.
"Sir?" Carter asked in confusion.
"Didn't you hear...?"
Jack moved to Daniel's tent, feeling an immense dread as he
bent to look inside....
Daniel was gone.
Jack's mind reeled and he felt a distinct, sharp pain at the
base of his neck that drove him to his knees, then Carter and
Teal'c were beside him helping him to sit down.
"Sir? What is it?"
In a haze, Jack could see them taking in the fact that Daniel
was missing, but it took him a few minutes to regain his composure
and speak...
"It's not me...Daniel...Something hit him..."
Carter's eyes widened as she took in the full implications
of that statement. Jack nodded, holding his head at the pain
it caused.
"Yeah.."
Jack got to his feet, trying to pull himself out of Daniel's
pain so he could function. Teal'c returned from checking the
perimeter and Jack could tell from the closed expression that
the Jaffa had found nothing to indicate who, or what, had taken
their friend.
Carter had been searching Daniel's tent and came back to Jack
carrying Daniel's hat in one hand and his notebook in the other.
There was blood on both.
Fighting a rising wave of panic and anger, Jack took the notebook.
There was something important about the notebook...
Trusting that he was somehow picking up on Daniel's thoughts,
Jack started to thumb through the pages full of Daniel's tight,
distinctive handwriting. To his shock, Jack found he could
actually make some sense of the unfamiliar words and phrases.
On the last page he found it...what Daniel wanted them to know....
Three words that were like a knife in Jack's gut...
'Temple of Nirrti'.
"Nirrti?" Carter was as shocked as Jack. "I
thought the System Lords..."
She trailed off as she realized they had no idea what sort
of punishment the Goa'uld System Lords might have imposed on
Nirrti for trying to kill Cronus, not to mention withholding
her phase shifting technology.
Either the punishment hadn't been very severe...or the self-proclaimed
Goddess of Darkness' had escaped...
Jack's thought had mirrored Carter's. "Yeah. And either
way, she hasn't got much reason to be happy to see us."
Teal'c had taken it all in silently. "But why take only
Daniel Jackson?"
Jack knew the answer, dreaded what it meant for Daniel...
"He's the bait. She wants us to come to her...."
Chapter 5
Dawn was less than an hour away as they began breaking camp,
taking only essential supplies so they could travel more quickly.
Teal'c could not defeat a feeling of trepidation as he thought
of their young friend in the hands of one of the most cold-blooded
Goa'uld he had ever known. They all knew of Nirrti's actions
on Cassandra's planet, her plans for the innocent girl, her
plot against Cronus...
Teal'c had heard tales of even worse atrocities, but wisely
did not inform Carter and O'Neill, they had enough to worry
about and wild speculation would not help...
Teal'c had suggested that O'Neill concentrate on his earlier,
brief mental contact with the missing scientist. O'Neill had
tried it, receiving a fleeting, uncertain impression that Daniel
Jackson was east of their current position, toward the mountains.
Despite O'Neill's doubts, they had travelled in that direction.
It was against O'Neill's usual methods to rely on nothing more
than "mumbo-jumbo", but at the present, Teal'c reasoned,
they had nothing else to go on.
Carter had agreed that whatever had occurred between the two
of them before hadn't completely disappeared and that the extreme
situation had reactivated the connection. O'Neill had looked
at his major with a bemused expression, but accepted the convoluted
logic of her argument.
Hours later, as they drew closer to the mountains, O'Neill
had fallen once again, clutching his temples. He had shakily
informed them that it felt like his brain was on fire...a Goa'uld
ribbon device. When he had recovered somewhat, O'Neill felt
sure that Daniel Jackson was alive...
Teal'c theorized that it was a deliberate act by Nirrti to
draw them to her. She was somehow aware of the mental bond
between O'Neill and Daniel Jackson...had perhaps even caused
it.
Carter tended to agree with Teal'c's theory. They had not
seen any other 'psychic bugs' in the many days they had been
on this planet and with the phase-shifting technology it would
have been easy to plant the bug on Daniel Jackson. Carter even
extrapolated that it was very possible they had been observed
from the moment of their arrival on P3J050. O'Neill restated
his original theory that the Stargate was somehow deliberately
being hidden from them. At the time, it had seemed O'Neill's
usual cautious paranoia, but now...
It had been a trap. A clever, insidious trap designed to lead
them to this point...If Nirrti had been observing them all
along, she knew all she needed to in order to exact her revenge...and
none of them doubted that revenge was what Nirrti wanted.
Just before dark, they came to the base of the mountain. Teal'c
and Carter watched as O'Neill tried to calm himself, to touch
the presence of their missing friend. It was visibly difficult.
As they had drawn closer to the mountain, O'Neill had been
like a man possessed, pushing them onward. The feeling of 'Daniel',
he said, had been fading steadily ever since the last wave
of pain...
With a sudden jolt, they were all brought to their hands and
knees by a sharp, burning sensation across the chest area.
Teal'c was the first to recover, helping the others to their
feet.
"Daniel?" Carter was in shock from her first experience
with what O'Neill had been going through.
O'Neill was nodding his head, still unable to speak.
"How?" Carter didn't have to explain what she meant
and the answer was evident to all of them. If they were all
feeling Daniel Jackson's pain it could only mean one thing...
Nirrti had subjected their friend to a fresh dose of the alien
venom, the venom that had caused him to become lost in his
own mind...
O'Neill urged them forward, passing into a narrow crevice
barely visible in the growing darkness. Teal'c knew...they
all knew...that it was all the more urgent that they find Daniel
Jackson...and soon. If O'Neill hadn't been with the young scientist
the first time, he could have been lost forever in the dark
places of his mind. Now, alone and in pain, there was no one
with Daniel Jackson who cared enough to pull him away from
the abyss of his own demon-ridden thoughts...
Passing through the crevice into a canyon, they were not entirely
surprised to find an ornate temple carved into the face of
the living rock.
Teal'c noted sadly that Daniel Jackson could have told them
the meanings and origins of the symbols carved into the facade.
There was no doubt in any of their minds though that this was
the temple in Daniel Jackson's notes...the Temple of Nirrti.
As a unit, they readied their weapons...years of training
taking over. The very stillness screamed out a warning to Teal'c
as they moved quietly into the temple...senses heightened to
pick up the slightest movement.
The team fell into the dance that had become second nature
to them...point, flank, rear guard...It came with the ease
of too much practice in too many tense situations. The dance
was marred only by the stark realization that one of the dancers
was missing...
For all his aversion to things 'military', Daniel Jackson
had earned a place for himself in that dance. He performed
it with a reluctant precision born out of necessity and the
desire to protect his team...just as they protected him.
O'Neill indicated through silent gestures that he knew that
Daniel Jackson was somewhere ahead of them. Teal'c and Carter
moved to cover O'Neill, who decided to take a direct approach
into whatever danger lay ahead, pushing the doors open with
his foot, weapon at the ready....
The room was large and dark, lit only by two torches on either
side of a low circular slab of dark stone at the center. In
the guttering light, Teal'c could make out a figure lying on
the slab....
It was Daniel Jackson...
Chapter 6
"Dammit..."
Jack couldn't hold back the curse as he moved to Daniel's
side. Teal'c and Carter flanked him, sweeping the room with
their weapons as they went.
From the referred pain they had experienced on their way here,
Jack hadn't expected Daniel to be in the best of condition,
but this....
Daniel's jacket, vest and uniform shirt were missing and the
black T-shirt had been sliced open down the front revealing
what looked like claw marks running jaggedly from his left
shoulder across to just above the beltline on the opposite
side. Green-black bruising spread from Daniel's left ear to
disappear beneath what was left of his shirt and blood was
seeping lazily into the younger man's eyes from a gash across
his forehead.
"Sir?" Carter was pointing at Daniel's wrist, swollen
and red with striated lines running outward from a bite wound
almost directly over the one that had nearly healed. It was
an all too familiar sight...
Jack put out a hand and felt the fever burning once again
in Daniel's body and for a moment gave free rein to the raging
anger that burned inside him just as intently as the fever
that raged inside Daniel.
"We've got to get him out of here," Jack knew he
was stating the obvious, but at this point he had to say something...anything...before
he could explode. There were no easy quips, no gentle teasing,
no derisive comments that would ease the white-hot rage burning
through his mind...
Teal'c moved forward to carry the limp form of their friend
while Jack looked around warily. He was beginning to get a
bad feeling about this. It had been too easy.
If they were lucky, Nirrti was off doing the sarcophagus thing.
Jack wasn't feeling particularly lucky....
"Did you think I would forget about you so soon?"
They turned toward the source of the vaguely feminine, dual-tone
voice...that inflection so unique to the Goa'uld.
Nirrti hadn't changed much; dark hair, flashing eyes...striking,
but not really beautiful in any way that Jack appreciated the
quality. The cold face reflected the cruelty at the core of
the 'Goddess of Darkness', robbing her of all pretense of beauty.
"I really had hoped you would..." Jack was stalling,
trying to think...
Nirrti smiled, not pleasantly.
"No, indeed. I have not forgotten you."
With a regal wave of her bejewelled hand, Nirrti indicated
ten Jaffa lining the walls, staff weapons at the ready. Jack
knew they had been there all along, hidden in the darkness
beyond the torchlight.
"You will dispose of your weapons now." Nirrti ordered.
Jack was torn...
Teal'c was hampered by the necessity of carrying Daniel. Jack
knew he and Carter could probably take out several of Nirrti's
Jaffa, but the door seemed impossibly far away...
'Jack...fight...'
It was Daniel, barely there, but urgent.
Jack didn't know if Carter had heard it or not, but he did
know that she would be watching for his signal. With the slightest
of nods, he gripped his weapon tighter...smiling thinly in
satisfaction as he saw Carter follow suit.
"I...really don't think we want to..."
Teal'c broke for the door then as Jack and Carter laid down
a covering fire, backing out behind them. Several of Nirrti's
Jaffa fell as bullets sprayed across the room.
'Just a few more feet...' Jack thought.
Jack felt a sudden scorching sensation across his shoulder
and heard Daniel cry out at the same time. Jack realized at
that moment that Daniel's mind was wide open to everything
going on around him; feeling the pain, the death...
As he looked back toward the door, Jack saw more Jaffa streaming
into the room and knew they weren't going to make it.
Nirrti called for her Jaffa to stop firing.
In the sudden stillness, Jack could hear, and feel, Daniel's
pain. The young man was moaning softly; his mind reeling from
the bombardment of sensations all around him.
It wasn't worth it...
Jack knew that whatever Nirrti had in mind, she wanted them
alive. Jack was more than a little familiar with a Jaffa's
deadly aim; if Nirrti had wanted them dead, they would already
be so.
If they could stay alive, and together, they had a chance...
With a resigned sigh, Jack lowered his weapon.
The Jaffa quickly stripped them of their weapons and outer
garments. Daniel was roughly pulled away from them and dropped
back into the center of the stone slab. The rest of the team
was led to three posts arranged in a semi-circled around the
stone slab and chained to them with their hands above their
heads, effectively keeping them on their feet.
Nirrti watched the process with a dark smile that chilled
Jack to his bones. He had come to expect cruelty from the Goa'uld;
he and his team had personally ticked off more Goa'ulds than
he could count. But this...
Nirrti didn't just want them dead....she wanted to grind them
up into small pieces and burn what was left...
Jack understood now why the normally diplomatic-minded Daniel
had urged them to fight their way out of here...
Daniel knew that the Goddess of Darkness intended to live
up to her name.
Chapter 7
Daniel came awake with the awareness that he was once again
lying on cold stone.
'No....'
Consciousness returned in a rush as he realized he could 'feel'
his friends close by. The pain, the concern, the steady presence
that was at the same time a comfort and a source of guilt.
Bits of memory, not all of which was his, helped Daniel piece
together recent events...
Nirrti, cold, dark thing that she was, revelling in revealing
her plans for the Tau'ri who had brought about her downfall....
The pain she had inflicted on him with such lascivious pleasure,
serving the dual purpose of allowing her to vent her rage as
well as providing the means to draw the rest of the SG team
to her....
The aborted rescue against overwhelming odds; Jack's realization
that they had no chance...and no choice....
Daniel had wondered at first why Nirrti hadn't simply captured
them all and gotten it over with, but soon realized the pleasure
she took in the game.
When her Jaffa had informed her that the others were near,
Nirrti had reintroduced Daniel to the Kray'toc insect that
possessed a venom which broke down the mind's natural defences...usually
leaving its victim dead...or hopelessly insane, broken under
the weight of psychic overload. Daniel seemed to recall a drawn
out explanation of the Kray'toc's origins, but after he had
been bitten again, his mind had become so preoccupied with
blocking out the alien evil that was Nirrti that he could no
longer hear her.
It had been at that point that Nirrti had raked her hand,
bearing the ribbon-device with its metallic fingertips, across
Daniel's chest in an agonizingly languid caress that would
have made him spit in her face if it hadn't been for the onslaught
of sadistic pleasure which poured into his mind. Nirrti had
used the pain to shatter the barriers Daniel had fought so
hard to hold in place.
Daniel breathed deeply, fighting the memory. He couldn't allow
himself to be drawn back down into that dark place he'd almost
become lost in before.....
'If it hadn't been for Jack...'
Jack. Teal'c. Sam.
They were there with him. Daniel had almost forgotten. If
he let his control slip just a little he could feel them. Jack's
concern-resolve that somehow they would find a way out. Sam
poured out waves of hope, certain in that courageous heart
of hers that together they would find a way out. Teal'c was
a steady beacon of indomitable will, overlying a deep sense
of guilt for failing his friends...
'Got to work on that,' Daniel thought wryly, '...later'.
Daniel slipped his precarious control back into place, not
wishing to impose his own thoughts and pain on his friends.
He tried to open his eyes, to let them know that he was alright....
'Well....sort of,' came the unbidden voice of truth that Daniel
so often wished would just shut up and let him remain blissfully
ignorant. It never listened.
On his second attempt, Daniel succeeded, blinking blearily
around the room. With vision more blurred than usual without
his glasses, he could make out the forms of his friends standing
several feet away from him, tied to something he couldn't quite
see...
"Daniel?"
Jack's voice helped Daniel locate the older man as he tried
to wipe the blood and sweat from his eyes.
"J-jack? Shouldn't be here..."
Jack forced a laugh. "Newsflash, Danny...None of us should
be here."
Jack quickly outlined their theory that everything that had
happened since the team's arrival on the planet had been part
of an elaborate trap.
Daniel confirmed it with a nod. "I think we..."
"Ticked her off?" Jack finished the thought with
his usual talent for bluntly cutting through to the heart of
a matter.
Daniel tried to raise himself up, but found his left leg had
been shackled to a ring embedded into the center of the stone
slab. He could stand, but wouldn't be able to move more than
two feet in any direction. Deciding it wasn't worth the effort,
Daniel laid back down.
"Daniel?" Sam's voice, concerned.
" S'okay...just tired...." Daniel tried to sound
reassuring, but knew he hadn't quite pulled it off. It was
taking all of his limited energy to protect his friends...from
him.
Daniel could feel his control wavering, trying to pull him
down into the maelstrom of pain, darkness...
"Wh..where is she?" he asked, unsure if they could
even hear his strained voice.
"Nirrti has left us alone to contemplate our fate," Teal'c
answered in a tone that left no doubt as to whose fate Teal'c
was contemplating.
Daniel couldn't see Jack clearly, but looked straight at where
he knew his friend's face was, letting Jack see his eyes. Daniel
knew that Jack could always read the truth in his eyes...
The both knew why Nirrti had left them alone. She was waiting
for the venom to take full effect, for the fever to rage within
Daniel until he could no longer maintain any semblance of control,
for him to entrap his friends in that netherworld of nightmare
and memory....
Jack quietly confirmed Daniel's unspoken assessment in terse,
angry voice. "Yeah."
Daniel knew that Jack understood everything; that even now
Daniel was fighting a losing battle to shield them. to shield
himself from their emotionally-charged distress. Daniel knew
with a dreadful certainty that all too soon he would lose his
battle and Nirrti would get what she wanted.
Daniel closed his eyes, gasping at the sudden onset of the
headache he had been dreading; it would only get worse now...
Beyond the building pain in his head, Daniel could hear Jack's
voice, tense and quiet, talking to Sam and
Teal'c...something about clearing their minds.
'If only... ' Daniel thought, distantly amused at how much
a certain Colonel's sarcasm appeared to be rubbing off...
Suddenly, Daniel could feel energy flowing through him. There
was something about it that felt like....
Jack.
Daniel recognized the rock-hard determination, the unswerving
focus that was Jack flowing into him, easing the burden...
All too swiftly it was gone, but Daniel felt uplifted by it.
Stronger. Able to keep on fighting. He found he was able to
open his eyes again and looked toward his friend.
"Jack? How?"
Even without the aid of his glasses, Daniel could make out
the flash of Jack's self-deprecating grin.
"Practice, Danny. Practice."
Chapter 8
Sam couldn't believed what she had just witnessed...
'Mr. Spock, indeed...' She thought, still gaping at her if-you-can't-see-it-it-ain't-real
colonel.
Sam had felt a heaviness lift that she hadn't realized was
not her own; Daniel's stress had evidently been seeping through
to all of them. Its absence was a welcome relief until she
realized that Daniel was still feeling it. The colonel's effort
had simply strengthened the barrier Daniel was using to protect
them.
She had no doubt that this mental battle was one which required
great effort. Daniel was trembling, his face a mask of concentrated
effort. The colonel looked severely drained, hanging limply
from his chains, after only a few minutes of trying to bolster
Daniel's failing strength.
Sam hadn't entirely understood the look that had passed between
the colonel and Daniel, but she knew her young colleague well
enough to read the inevitability in those expressive blue eyes...
Sam was startled from her thoughts by the sound of footsteps
approaching the door.
The colonel stood up quickly, speaking quietly, but urgently. "Whatever
happens, try to keep your minds clear. It's hard enough for
him without us adding to it..."
The 'him' in question seemed to be gathering his scattered
energies, preparing for what he, better than any of them, knew
was coming.
Nirrti swept into the room grandly, a goddess in attitude,
if not in aspect.
"I trust you have had time to reflect?"
Sam felt like Nirrti was speaking to all of them, but her
eyes never strayed from Daniel. Sam had the distinct feeling
that Nirrti had not expected to find Daniel doing quite so
well.
As Nirrti ran a finger across the gash on Daniel's forehead,
Sam felt a flicker of pain before the barrier snapped back
into place. Nirrti seemed to notice it, too.
Calling two of her Jaffa, Nirrti directed them to hoist Daniel
to his feet and hold him there. Grabbing Daniel by his hair,
she raised his face and looked into the pained eyes. Sam could
read the determination in Daniel's eyes, he wouldn't give in
willingly...
A flash of gold was their only warning as Nirrti struck Daniel
across the cheek, drawing blood once again. At that same moment,
Sam felt the heaviness return a hundredfold, intermingled with
physical and mental pain so intense that she felt her knees
give way. It took all of the discipline learned from her father's
example on up until she herself had gone through Air Force
training, all of the Tok'ra training she knew from Jolinar,
everything she had ever learned about controlling her thoughts
and emotions... not to cry out, to give voice to Daniel's mute
pain.
Sam was marginally aware that Teal'c was straining against
the chains that bound him, his muscular frame a study in agonized
futility. The colonel...the colonel was standing arrow straight
looking at Nirrti with a cold rage in his eyes that promised
slow, unmerciful death...
Just as quickly Sam saw the mask settle back over the colonel's
features; he was sublimating his own rage to protect Daniel.
Daniel was trying so hard to regroup, to recapture that fragile
control. Sam saw the colonel close his eyes and knew what he
was attempting to do...As she watched, Daniel seemed to stand
a little straighter, his eyes regaining focus. Nirrti seemed
enraged by this defiance, clearly she hadn't expected the Tau'ri
to be capable of fighting her chosen weapon.
Nirrti tightened her hold in Daniel's hair."Fight as
you will, in the end you will fail."
Daniel glared at Nirtti with all the dignified contempt he
could muster, not wasting his energy on words she would ignore
anyway.
Sam could see a cruel smile begin to form on Nirrti's pale
face and felt her blood run cold. Before Sam could cry out
a warning, Nirrti had activated her ribbon device...bearing
down on Daniel with agonizing slowness...
The pain was like nothing Sam had ever known...echoing through
Daniel's mind to all of them. Sam felt blackness threatening
and knew that, for Daniel's sake, it would be best to give
in to it.
Chapter 9
Jack came awake with a start, remembering the last thing he'd
felt before passing out. Daniel...his mind on fire, still valiantly
struggling to protect them. Jack remembered thinking that things
would probably be easier for Daniel if they all did pass out;
it would allow Daniel to focus what little energy he had on
protecting himself, but that would have meant leaving Daniel
alone with Nirrti...
Jack had tried to reach out one last time, support his friend
as he had before...
The pain was intense. Daniel had compared it once to being
inside a pressure cooker...the pain building, quantifying itself
with every wave....
Jack had managed a weak contact...and been shocked to the
core when Daniel pushed him away with a flash of fear for Jack's
safety...
Jack's head...hurt, his arms aching from hanging from the
chains, his body numb from lying on the cold stone. On the
cold stone?
Despite the pain it caused, he opened his eyes scanning the
room around him, only then realizing that they were all unchained...except
for Daniel.
"Daniel?"
Jack raised up, too quickly, and felt blackness threatening.
Teal'c moved out of the shadows to support Jack as he made
his way over to the still figure lying in the center of the
room.
It was evident that Teal'c and Carter had tried to clean Daniel's
injuries. His face was free of blood for the first time since
they'd entered this place. Jack wasn't sure if he liked being
able to see Daniel's face like this. Daniel looked dead; a
paleness beyond transparency, cheekbones hollow beneath the
gash that ran from upper lip to ear, eyes sunken and bruised-looking
from the hollow, purple smudges beneath them.
Teal'c and Sam had found their discarded jackets and had covered
Daniel with all of them. The bundling only served to heighten
the sense of frailness that clung to the young man like a shroud...
Jack shuddered, casting off the dark thoughts; negativity
wouldn't get them out of here...
Jack sat down next to Daniel, wondering again why Daniel was
still chained. Jack could feel the fever radiating off Daniel
without having to touch him and realized suddenly why Nirrti
had left the young man chained...
She knew they couldn't get out of the windowless room, even
if they could...they wouldn't leave Daniel...
"Daniel Jackson is very ill," Teal'c announced in
as gentle a voice as Jack had ever heard from the big Jaffa.
Teal'c didn't make a habit of putting his emotions on display,
but long acquaintance had taught Jack to recognize the signs
of extreme distress in the other man.
Carter had been rattling around in the corner and came over
to Jack with a bowl of something that didn't smell too inedible.
"I guess Nirrti wants to keep us alive for the next round." Carter
said tersely. Her eyes were dark with worry as she looked down
at Daniel.
"Has he...?" Jack didn't have to finish the sentence.
Carter shook her head. "No, Sir...he hasn't come around
at all. Not even when we..." her voice caught and she
gestured to indicate the blood-soaked rags they had used to
clean Daniel's wounds.
Jack drank some of the water, trying to clear his aching head.
He had to think, he had to do something...anything...to get
his team out of here.
"Jack..."
The voice was barely a breath of sound, but it made them all
jump.
Daniel was looking up at Jack, the hooded blue eyes nearly
black, reflecting the infinite weariness of a spirit pushed
beyond endurance and on the verge of letting go...
Jack tried to keep his voice level."Daniel, how you doin'?"
'Lame, Jack,' he thought to himself, 'a blind man could see
the kid's dyin' here...'
Daniel nodded slightly and Jack realized his thoughts had
been 'spoken' as loudly as his words. Daniel knew how bad things
were, but Jack knew he would let his friends harbor their illusions
if it would make things easier for them.
Jack felt a surge of unreasonable anger at Daniel. He wouldn't
let his friend quit now; he had to keep Daniel fighting...
"Look, Danny..."
Jack took a deep breath, wishing that Teal'c and Carter would
disapppear for a minute, then decided it didn't mattter. They
were in this together
Jack tried again. "Daniel, you are going to make it.
I'll think of something. Don't I always?"
Daniel gave a ghost of a smile, before he was gripped by a
wave of pain and could no longer hold the walls in place...
Pain...His brain was on fire!...Third time was supposed to
be a charm. God, it hurt....Jack...Sam...Teal'c....can't hold
on.....
Daniel's pain and regret rolled over them in waves, but somehow
Jack managed to put a hand on Daniel's forehead, diving once
again for that place he was beginning to know so well; shoring
up the walls, lending support to the failing strength...
Jack opened his eyes to find Teal'c supporting him next to
Daniel. Jack felt drained beyond measure, but realized it had
been the only thing he could do to help Daniel. Until he'd
touched the weakened core of his friend, Jack hadn't let himself
believe that Daniel could actually die.
Daniel was the comeback kid. When life knocked him down, Daniel
got back up and kept living....
Daniel couldn't die...
Jack wouldn't allow it.
Chapter 10
Teal'c recognized the reckless look that came into O'Neill's
eyes. Knowing that something profound had passed between the
two men beside him, Teal'c could only wait and see what the
usually resourceful O'Neill had planned.
Daniel Jackson was looking slightly stronger and Teal'c noticed
a look of anguish pass over the young man's features.
"Jack....no...."
Whatever O''Neill had in mind, it was clear that Daniel Jackson
vehemently opposed it.
O'Neill glared at the seriously ill young man, not unkindly. "Daniel,
for once, would you just let us help you without arguing about
it..."
Teal'c felt there was probably more to the thought by the
way that Daniel Jackson was looking at O'Neill with brows furrowed
and eyes reflecting a pain that was more than physical.
O'Neill got up unsteadily, motioning Teal'c and Carter away
from Daniel Jackson. A futile move, in Teal'c's opinion, as
it seemed that Daniel Jackson did not need to hear their voices
to know what was being said.
"Look, guys....the only way out of this for Daniel is
to... go through it," O'Neill hesitated a moment before
continuing. It seemed to Teal'c that O'Neill was debating something
within himself.
"It won't be easy...," O'Neill glanced uncomfortably
at Daniel Jackson, obviously aware that Daniel Jackson knew
what they were saying on one level or another. Teal'c understood
the Tau'ri prepossession with personal privacy, but there was
a point, he knew, where privacy ended and survival began.
"Daniel Jackson cannot survive another encounter with
Nirrti," Teal'c observed, putting into words what they
had all most certainly been thinking. "He has fought bravely,
but he cannot continue...We cannot allow it."
Carter nodded firm agreement. "We can't let her win,
Sir."
O'Neill looked at them, gratitude and something much more
profound shining out of his eyes. He looked over at the pale,
huddled figure of Daniel Jackson.
"We won't." O'Neill drew a deep breath, exhaling
slowly. "He's gonna hate this, but I think...together...we
can speed things up a little." O'Neill smiled grimly,
a ghost of his usual good humor. "Hell, if two heads are
better than one, four should be downright unstoppable."
Daniel's voice moaned softly, "Jack, you can't..."
The group rejoined a visibly agitated Daniel Jackson, who
was trying to raise himself up. "Jack, I can't let you
guys do this..."
O'Neill put a gentle hand on Daniel Jackson's shoulder. "Daniel..." O'Neill
took a deep breath as he looked into Daniel Jackson's eyes.
Teal'c was sure that on some level, be it mental or simply
the depth of communication these two men had long seemed able
to express with little more than a glance, O'Neill and Daniel
Jackson were reaching an agreement.
Daniel Jackson was the first to look away, closing his eyes
in resignation, "Okay, Jack..." He looked up at Teal'c
and Carter, apology in his eyes.
Carter put into words what Teal'c could not. "Daniel,
we want to help you. You're our friend."
Teal'c nodded once in mute agreement, letting his eyes speak
what he was not able to.
Teal'c knew, as they all did, that the sometimes self-effacing
young man often had difficulty understanding the value they
all placed on him; not only as a member of the team, but also
as a friend. Daniel Jackson, for all his great knowledge, could
not fathom his own worth.
O'Neill smiled in a blatant attempt to break the somber mood. "Hell,
Danny...Let's just call it group therapy."
Chapter 11
'Group therapy, hunh?'
Sam recalled the pain-ridden thoughts that had assailed them
all before; beyond the immediate pain she had been aware of
brief images of other, remembered pain....
Ra...Sha're...Apophis....Hathor...
Sam had been trying to deal with those spectral flashes of
memory since she'd awakened, cold and stiff on the floor. She
thought she'd gotten used to dealing with alien memories with
Jolinar, but this felt, somehow, more intrusive. A person's
life was full of thoughts and feelings that were private...not
to be shared except by choice.
Daniel hadn't been given a choice...
Sam reflected again on the many ways fate had conspired to
torment one of the best people she knew. It was like some kind
of cosmic bad karma had settled over Daniel in childhood and
was determined not to grant him peace...
The source of her concern was still protesting weakly as they
prepared for one of the toughest battles of their lives...for
Daniel's life.
The colonel was no longer arguing with Daniel. He had decided
on a plan, all that was left was to carry it out; and the colonel
never debated a plan of action...especially when it was the
only one they had.
"Jack, please..." Daniel's tone had changed; no
longer argumentative, but softer and more urgent.
Sam saw the colonel's eyes flash, "Daniel, don't..."
Sam wasn't sure what Daniel had been about to say, but she
was sure that the colonel was flat-out refusing to hear it.
Sam realized that in Daniel's place, she would have been trying
to say goodbye...just in case; to settle things with her friends.
Sam wondered why Daniel had even attempted it. Daniel knew
the colonel as well as she did...better, in fact...
Colonel Jack O'Neill did not accept the possibility of defeat.There
would be no goodbyes, not even the contemplation of them, not
until all possible alternatives had been exhausted...and probably
not even then.
The colonel seated himself beside Daniel, gently maneuvering
the trembling form up to lean against him...grimacing in apology
for the pain it caused. Teal'c settled himself on the colonel's
right while Sam settled on his left.
The colonel gave them an intense look that spoke of battles
won, of purposes joined, of a commonality of spirit that made
them the team they were...
Sam realized that Daniel was looking at them, too. His look
was softer, more personal; speaking of shared pain and shared
joy, of friendship and gratitude...
It was the goodbye that Daniel could not voice....
Sam tried to respond with her own determined smile, encouraging
him to fight, but wondered if it really managed to register
with Daniel whose eyes were beginning to lose focus as another
wave of pain approached...
The colonel breathed deeply one last time, his eyes focused
solely on Daniel, revealing things in those dark depths that
Sam could only begin to guess at...
With a quick, tight smile the colonel asked, "Ready?"
Daniel laughed then at some private joke between the two of
them and shook his head, "No, but let's do it anyway..."
The colonel's smile deepened, eyes reflecting a brief flicker
of something deep and bittersweet, "That's my boy..."
Sam had only a moment to steel her nerves and clear her mind,
before Jack nodded and the journey into Daniel's private hell
had begun...
Chapter 12
Daniel was falling....
It was a sensation that was becoming irritatingly familiar.
Memories flashed by at breakneck speed, clashing and intertwining
into nightmare...
Daniel was assailed by waves of strong emotion as he passed
by, falling ever downward into that dark prison of his soul;
guilt, anger, hurt, betrayal...
All the large and terrifying nightmares of his life seemed
to conspire against him, pulling him at him...
A part of Daniel was aware that there was something subtly
different this time. He knew that his body was far weaker than
it had been the first time, but it was something more than
that. Perhaps he had been holding those walls in place too
long, trying to protect his friends....
**His friends...what an amazing concept...except for his brief
time on Abydos and the distant memory of belonging he'd had
with his parents, Daniel had never known such acceptance...struggled
daily to be worthy of their esteem...
The rock-solid presence was there now, chasing away the self-doubt.
Daniel anchored himself to that discernable 'Jack-ness', holding
to it as if it were his last hope...
It embarrassed him slightly to need that support; he'd felt
so completely adrift lately...
A rueful 'laugh' echoed through the bond they had created,
'That's what friends do...'
Daniel was shocked to hear the open admission from Jack, for
all they'd been through the words had never been said...had
never needed to be....
Here, it seemed, all the barriers were down...and all the
rules had gone out the window....
Daniel felt himself slipping away from Jack...only to feel
himself supported by another steady strength. Teal'c? A feeling
of calm touched Daniel's exhausted spirit...an affectionate
respect for the non-warrior who nonetheless met conflict with
courage and passion...
All too swiftly that presence slipped away. Daniel couldn't
seem to keep his friends in focus...so tired...
A gentler touch grabbed onto him; holding him, keeping him
from the darkness. Sam? Sam knew this pain...knew what it was
to become lost in a flood of memory...
**He'd rejected her...feared her...feared for her...**
The hard-edged sweetness that was Sam forgave him, had never
blamed him. Understood...
Daniel felt a surge of strength. Jack again. Comfort flowed;
a steady, surprisingly gentle strength....
A profound sadness swept over Daniel, a heart-stopping ache
that never went away. Daniel 'shared' a surge of grief and
regret for all that his steadfast friend had lost...opening
himself to take some of that pain away....
With an amused exasperation that was all too familiar to them
all, Jack reminded Daniel that he was the one they were 'here'
to help, but Daniel would not, could not, bear to leave that
pain unattended. Extending his heart and mind a little wider,
Daniel accepted into himself as much of Jack's hurt as he could
bear....
It was hard...
Daniel had shared this with Jack before, remembered the physical
ache of it when he'd awakened after that first experience.
He tried to take more, but Jack stopped him with a mental nudge;
a reminder that time was short. A deeper, subtler contact spoke
of respect and gratitude for Daniel's willingness to put others
before himself...
Teal'c rejoined them then and together the team encircled Daniel's
flagging spirit, guarding against any and all threats to their
young friend.
Daniel felt as if he were at the center of a protective shield
which met and deflected all it came into contact with; the
team worked as it always had, each using their own unique abilities
to confront and defeat anything that would threaten one of
its members...
When the demons came, Nirrti's evil gift, they fought their
way through them together, helping to keep Daniel grounded,
not allowing him to sink back into the darkness...
Frightening images assailed them all; Nirrti's centuries long
thirst for blood, for pain...
**Her plan to keep all her planets under watch, hoping to
someday exact her revenge on the Tau'ri who had brought about
her downfall...
**Planting the Kray'toc on the young human; knowing that he
would be the one who would first figure out that this was her
world...buying time to put a plan into place...
**Watching the two Tau'ri at the campsite...seeing the value
these humans placed on friendship, forming a plan based on
that weakness...
**Abducting the young one, playing with him, laying out her
plan and watching his agony as he fought so futilely against
the inevitable...
**Forcing him into her mind, enjoying his disgust; proud that
he hated her darkness and allowing him to feel so much of it...
The team reeled under the weight of everything that Daniel
had gone through at Nirrti's hands; taking the burden and sharing
it, accepting it and making it their own. A lesson learned
from Daniel, who had done it for them so many times....
Chapter 13
In some private corner of his mind, Jack grieved.
It had been a long time since he had allowed himself the luxury
of release and he knew he should not be doing it now, but the
pain of loss was as fresh in his mind as it had been that day...nearly
four years ago now....
Jack could not believe that Daniel, for all the pain he, himself,
was going through would put aside his own immediate need to
tend to Jack's old familiar pain. It had been a long road to
understanding Daniel and Jack was beginning to realize he probably
never would, and that was okay...he knew what was important
to know.
Jack refocused all of his attention on the efforts of his
team, never more proud of them than he was at this moment.
The team that had been considered the 'least likely to succeed'
from several quarters had once again proven itself. ..
Daniel 'felt' stronger to Jack, the younger man was still far
too weak...they could all feel the pervasive pain of Daniel's
injuries like distant, hollow echoes in their own bodies, but
the fever had eased and Jack knew their task was almost complete.
Teal'c had been trying to keep a portion of his attention
'outside' to warn them and broke into the link to tell them
that footsteps were approaching...
'Damn, that woman has lousy timing...'
Jack tried to untangle them from their mental 'huddle', pulling
back slowly to make sure that Daniel would not falter...
Too late!
Nirrti was here...aware of what they were doing...diving in
to stop them...
Jack had a brief impression of things getting crowded and
then had no more time to think...
Nirrti, or rather the blackness that represented her in this
place, was bearing down on them...focusing her attack on Daniel,
who threw up a weak barrier between Nirrti and his friends...
Nirrti, ancient and powerful in the ways of assaulting the
human mind, broke through with little effort...again advancing
on Daniel with an alien cry full of rage.
Teal'c jumped to the forefront, imposing his great will upon
the Goa'uld who would bring harm to his friends, but Nirrti
'cast' him aside with a blast of thought.
On some level, Jack knew that alone they had no hope of defeating
Nirrti, but together...
Nirrti was overwhelming Daniel, determined to eradicate this
Tau'ri who so stubbornly refused to allow her the victory she
craved. Jack could feel the darkness pushing Daniel downward,
trying to undo all they had worked so hard to accomplish. With
an almost instinctive insight, Jack pulled Carter and Teal'c
together, directing and focusing their individual energies
to form one concerted 'push' forcing Nirrti to retreat for
a moment in shock.
Taking advantage of Nirrti's absence, Jack gathered his team
around Daniel, drawing him into their merged strength...
It was as if a part that had been missing had suddenly moved
into place. Together, they 'fit' in a way that Jack would never
have believed possible. Each of them possessed unique, individual
strengths; strengths that made them operate in a way many found
difficult to understand. The alien warrior, the soldier-scientist,
the civilian-scholar and the irrepressible officer...an impossible
combination that had learned how to work together against impossible
odds and found itself stronger with every effort...
The SG1 'presence' took advantage of Nirrti's momentary lapse.
Under Jack's direction, the team formed a battering ram of
concentrated will, pushing the darkness away from Daniel, back
to her own mind...
With an effort, Jack dissolved the link, briefly hoping that
Daniel had the strength to hold his own without them. Jack
fought off the exhaustion, noting that Nirrti was still reeling
from their 'push' and that there were only two Jaffa with her.
Jack sprung to his feet quickly, disarming one Jaffa with a
body blow that focused all of the repressed energy and anger
he'd been holding in since they'd lost Daniel.
To his left, he noticed Teal'c was up and engaging a second
Jaffa, easily relieving the stunned warrior of his weapon and
opening fire. Jack disposed of his target with his newly acquired
staff weapon and looked around for Nirrti...
The Goddess of Darkness was gone...
Jack started to go after her, but looked back to see Carter
bending over Daniel. Deciding that Nirrti could wait...or go
to Hell for all he cared, Jack moved to Daniel's side...
The kid still looked half-dead, but a little less so than
when they had started out. Sam was busily checking vital signs,
nodding at each new encouraging improvement.
"I think he's going to be alright, Colonel..."
The unspoken 'but' just lingered there. Jack knew, they all
knew, that Daniel needed to get home, back to SGC and Dr. Fraiser...but
there was still the little matter of a missing Stargate and
the strong possibility of fighting their way out of here.
"Let's just get him out of here." Jack ordered,
incredibly relieved to be saying the words...to be able to
meet the crisis with some form of action. "We'll worry
about the rest later."
Teal'c stepped up to the chains which held Daniel to the stone
slab. Activating the staff weapon and wielding it with the
skill of long experience, Teal'c blasted away the metal shackle
that held the young man.
Teal'c handed over the staff weapon to Carter and bent to
lift Daniel, nearly lost in Teal'c's jacket, with the utmost
care. After their experiences of the past few hours, they were
all feeling a residual closeness; a need to protect that fragile
link that had completed them in a way they had never felt before.
Jack took point with Teal'c following and Carter bringing
up the rear. The hallways were eerily quiet, Jack moved forward
slowly glancing briefly around a corner...
A staff blast ripped chunks of masonry from the ornate wall,
scattering debris over them. Jack rolled forward firing as
he went and Carter moved up to cover him. Nirrti's Jaffa fell,
the lighted eyes of his helmet flickering once before going
out. Jack checked the remainder of the hallway, motioning Teal'c
to follow, and they moved ever closer to the door.
A weak voice stopped them, " Wait, Jack...."
Jack remembered a time when he would have ignored the plea,
but now...in this place...after everything that had happened....
Teal'c placed Daniel gently on the ground and Jack bent to
join him.
"What is it, Daniel?"
Daniel was fighting his exhaustion, but was obviously, urgently,
trying to make them understand something. " Jack...the
gate..."
"What about it, Danny?" Jack was fighting his natural
instinct to act first and talk about it later.
Daniel took a deep breath, visibly gathering the last vestiges
of his strength, " It's here, Jack. The Stargate is here...in
the temple."
Chapter 14
Daniel Jackson had lost consciousness again following his
revelation that the Stargate they had entered this world through
was somehow here in this temple, a week's journey away. Carter
theorized that Daniel Jackson had probably been privy to many
of Nirrti's thoughts, beyond those that the evil Goa'uld had
purposely inflicted upon him.
Teal'c felt a familiar surge of protectiveness for his young
friend. Having touched Daniel Jackson's thoughts, Teal'c knew
that the young man whom he had always held in high regard was
more than his equal, if not in strength, then in determination.
Teal'c realized it was something he had always known.
O'Neill was thinking, trying to formulate a plan based on
this new information. O'Neill's glance at Daniel Jackson, lying
pale and boneless in Teal'c arms, spoke volumes of his desire
to get the ill young man away from Nirrti's influence...as
far and as fast as possible.
Teal'c could still feel something of the bond between them,
although the feeling seemed to be fading over time. It had
touched a place in him that he had thought lost long ago. He
had known many associations among Apophis' Jaffa, but nothing
like the closeness he shared with these particular Tau'ri.
This...unity, the sensation of belonging to something that
as a whole was far greater than the sum of its parts, was something
new to Teal'c. Individually they each possessed exceptional
abilities and talents, but together they were a team in every
sense of the word that Teal'c understood...and a force to be
reckoned with.
O'Neill came to a decision. "Let's find a place to get
him under cover. Teal'c and I will take care of Nirrti and
the rest of her Jaffa." O'Neill looked regretfully at
Daniel Jackson. "Carter...I hate to do it, but you'll
have to wake him up, find out what he knows about the 'gate."
Teal'c could hear the anger in O'Neill's voice; anger at the
necessity of once more asking Daniel Jackson to go beyond the
limits of his endurance, asking him to do the impossible...knowing
that he would gladly do it, for their sakes if not for his
own.
Teal'c took the young man into his arms again effortlessly.
Daniel Jackson had been too ill for too long now and his weight
was far less than it had ever been in the time that Teal'c
had known him.
O'Neill reached out to pull the jacket closed over the young
man's bare chest, his eyes reflecting a deep concern and unspoken
rage that equaled Teal'c's own.
"Let's do it, kids."
The team moved out again quietly; O'Neill stopping at every
door along the narrow corridor, visually searching every room.
When they came to a rather lavish bedroom, likely Nirrti's
own, O'Neill decided that Carter and Daniel Jackson would remain
there. The room was large and "over-done in a Goa'uld-y
kind of way", as O'Neill termed it; but it had a bed,
access to water, linens for bandages and only one entry.
Teal'c lay his fragile charge gently upon the bed, covering
him with a velvet blanket. The battered face looked almost
lost among the opulence and Teal'c felt a surge of anger renewed
...
O'Neill called them over to the door without a backward glance
and Teal'c understood all too well that O'Neill was feeling
the same anger that now burned within him, looking back at
Daniel Jackson would only serve to fuel the already raging
fire...
O'Neill was about to admonish Carter to lock and blockade
the door behind them when Teal'c caught a flash of movement
near the bed...
Nirrti, ribboned hand on Daniel Jackson's forehead, smiled
coldly at them...certain of her victory.
"You have fought well Tau'ri, " Nirrti sounded surprised, "but
the battle is over."
Teal'c looked at O'Neill, ready to follow his commander's
instincts on this.
O'Neill flashed Teal'c and Carter a look that Teal'c recognized
as being far from defeat. Teal'c felt a surge of adrenaline;
if O'Neill was willing to fight, he had a plan...
O'Neill smiled at Nirrti, Oh...I don't think so...."
Several things happened quickly: Daniel Jackson's eyes snapped
open, both hands pushing Nirrti backwards as he threw his weakened
body off the opposite side of the bed; two Jaffa burst into
the room behind them, Teal'c and Carter whirling around to
take them on; O'Neill launched himself across the bed towards
Nirrti, who activated her ribbon device, focusing it on O'Neill.
O'Neill stiffened, caught in the grip of the mind-searing
pain...
As he fought Nirrti's Jaffa, Teal'c was aware that Daniel
Jackson was moving, slowly and with little coordination, but
advancing on the Goddess of Darkness...
Teal'c dispatched his opponent and took possession of a staff
weapon, firing upon the Jaffa that Carter was fighting. They
both turned just in time to see Daniel Jackson strike Nirrti
on the back of the head with one of her own ornate vases. ..
Nirrti fell to the ground heavily. Carter and Teal'c moved
to help O'Neill to his feet, holding him as he shook off the
effects of the ribbon device. Daniel Jackson stood, swaying
unsteadily, staring intently at the remnant of the vase in
his hand.
O'Neill looked questioningly at the young scientist. "Daniel?
What..?"
Daniel Jackson finally looked up at them, a ghost of his usual
enthusiasm in his eyes, "Jack...this was a First Kingdom
original, it..."
They would never know how Daniel Jackson intended to finish
the statement; even as the relief washed over them at Daniel
Jackson sounding so much like Daniel Jackson, the young man
dropped the shard in his hands and collapsed into Teal'c's
arms.
Chapter 15
Sam led the colonel to the bed, sitting him down beside their
once again unconscious friend. Teal'c had moved to restrain
Nirrti, but found that she was gone...
'Good riddance,' Sam thought, her own anger was far from sated,
but they had more important things to worry about....
"He's gonna be just fine..." The colonel said, smiling
down at Daniel, relief evident in his voice.
Teal'c looked confused. "Was there some doubt of that,
O'Neill?"
Sam recognized a brief expression of fear in the colonel's
eyes, quickly hidden. "No, Teal'c...I guess there wasn't...."
Sam insisted that the colonel wait with Daniel while she and
Teal'c checked out the temple. The colonel was about to argue
with that when they heard the sound of transport rings. Sam
and Teal'c ran across the hall just in time to see Nirrti and
her remaining Jaffa dematerializing within the rings.
"There will be another time..." Nirrti's voice echoed,
long after the rings had swept her away.
They returned to the bedroom to find the colonel trying to
wake Daniel.
"Come on, buddy...time to get out of here..." The
colonel shook Daniel hesitantly, trying not to disturb his
injuries.
Daniel came awake with a jump, looking around as if for a
threat. "Jack..."
Sam recalled that nightmare look and realized that although
their memories seemed to be fading, Daniel's would be a long
time going away. The things they had encountered inside Daniel's
mind were far too ingrained to be melted away in the space
of one fell swoop of 'Dr. Jack O'Neill's group therapy'. Sam
only hoped that some of Daniel's self-doubt and uncertainty
of his place among them had been healed...
The colonel had put a hand on Daniel's shoulder, squeezing
it reassuringly. "It's okay, Danny....Nirrti's gone."
Daniel laid back, nodding, breathing deeply to calm himself. "Dead?"
Sam shook her head, regretfully, "No, Daniel...she transported
out."
Jack grinned, "Ran like a scalded dog."
Daniel raised a hand to rub his eyes, smiling a little. "How
appropriate..."
Sam laughed at the implied insult in that observation. The
colonel smiled as well, turning his attention to their immediate
situation.
"Daniel, we need to find that 'gate and get out of here," he
said gently.
Daniel nodded, raising himself up slowly and putting out a
hand for the colonel to help him up. The colonel started to
protest, but Sam saw something pass between the two of them,
something that spoke of pride, dignity and seeing things through
to completion. The colonel took the offered hand and together
they staggered their way down the hall, leaving Teal'c and
Sam to stare after them in confusion before following.
Daniel led them slowly down into the depths of the temple;
stopping often to rest, but pushing onward under his own steam,
leaning on the unsteady support of the colonel. It had been
a long difficult week for the entire team, but Sam knew the
two men leading them had been through hell and back again in
a way that she and Teal'c had only begun to understand.
From her brief experience inside Daniel's mind, Sam knew that
there were depths there that she would never know, that Daniel
would never allow her to know. Something in the trust that
Daniel held in the colonel had allowed Daniel to let the colonel
in to those dark, hidden places...believing in his friend enough
to trust him with them. Sam had briefly discovered similar
hidden depths within the colonel that she would never have
suspected. A core of pain and long-disused empathy that only
rarely was allowed to come to the surface...she'd only seen
brief flashes of it in the time she'd known the colonel...always
welcome, aways surprising.
Daniel led them to a door at the end of yet another dark hallway,
stopping to lean against the wall as his strength began to
fail...
Teal'c offered silent assistance, but Daniel shook his head...that
core of steel asserting itself to finish this thing on his
feet...
Sam and Teal'c took the lead, opening the door cautiously
and sweeping the room with their stolen staff weapons...
There, in the center of the room stood the Stargate....the
most welcome sight any of them had viewed in too long a time.
Sam moved to the DHD, awaiting the order.
The colonel smiled as he and Daniel moved forward together,
reeling slightly in a way that made Sam wonder who was supporting
whom...
"Dial us home, Major."
Chapter 16: Epilog
Jack leaned back in his chair, stretching broadly until he
felt the twinge in his aching shoulders. He was glad to be
back on Earth, even if all he'd seen so far was the Gateroom,
a couple of hallways and the inside of the infirmary...
They'd walked through the Stargate together...he and Daniel...holding
on to each other for support. It was appropriate, Jack thought;
the entire mission had required them to support each other
in ways they never had before. Jack had felt Daniel's knees
give way as they'd stepped into the event horizon and had tightened
his hold on his friend.
His friend....
'Yeah,' Jack thought, 'that's what he is...'
It wasn't an easy admission for Jack to make, even to himself.
He'd never felt like he needed much in the way of friendship.
The life he'd led had never lent itself well to forming long-term
relationships. There was never enough time, always one more
mission....
Then along had come Daniel. Geeky, true...but so damn likeable...in
an irritating sort of way...
Daniel...
Jack turned to watch his friend, sleeping once again in the
infirmary, an all too familiar sight. Doc had sewed Daniel
up, stuck him back together again...said something about acute
lymphangitis, dehydration...and a lot of other -itis's and
-ation's that Jack had no desire to learn the meanings of.
The bottom line was that with treatment and rest...Daniel was
going to be fine.
Jack remembered the tingle in his head, back in Nirrti's bedroom...a,
by then, familiar carrier wave that had told him that Daniel
was awake, waiting for Jack to make a move...
He'd always known that the kid had more guts than luck...
Those little flashes of Daniel were fading rapidly now that
the venom was working its way out of Daniel's system. Jack
was glad of that...as enlightening as it had been taking a
tour through Daniel's psyche, it wasn't a trip that Jack cared
to repeat any time in the near future...
Jack hoped he wouldn't completely forget everything, but a
lot of it he prayed that he would...and soon. There was a lot
more to Daniel than Jack had ever really given him credit for.
Some of it he had known on that deep, instinctive level that
he usually relied on to measure the worth of a person; the
part of him that had responded to the man so unlike himself.
Some of what Jack had learned about Daniel, he'd already guessed
at on those few occasions that he allowed himself to become
reflective...times like this in fact...waiting to see if the
famous Jackson luck was going to hold out one more time...
Other things Jack had learned had rocked him to the core...things
that still made him feel like an eavesdropper...
"Me, too..."
It was Daniel's voice, raw with exhaustion.
Jack started to make a rude joke when he realized that he
hadn't been speaking aloud.
''Oh, shit...''
Daniel laughed, "Don't worry, Jack...it's going away." Daniel
looked away slightly. "It's just easier to 'hear' you
because..."
"I know...we had more practice..." Jack shook his
head, reaffirming the decision he had made nearly a week ago...it
didn't really matter.
Daniel shifted, wincing in pain at the pull on his stitches.
Jack could tell from the way his friend was looking everywhere
but at him that Daniel was trying to find words that wouldn't
come easy to either of them. Words like 'thank you'....
Daniel looked up at him then, nodding solemn agreement to
the unstated thought...
Jack laughed softly, shaking his head.
Daniel looked at him curiously. "What?'
"Just thinking..." Jack was being purposely coy.
"What?"
"We need to get Feretti into a card game before this
stuff goes away..."
"Jack..."
They laughed together at the lame joke, needing to laugh,
to feel the normalcy slip back into place. Jack knew they'd
be a long time getting over all that had happened to them,
all that had passed between them...but they would make it.
The walls might slip back into place...it was only right that
they should; but they'd learned the hard way how to trust each
other, to read each other to the point of knowing what the
other was thinking...Nothing had happened to change that and
Jack hoped it never would.
Jack felt the little tickle that was Daniel in his mind again.
'Me, too, Jack. Me, too...'
*fin*